Our country is taking the war on obesity very seriously; it has added another meal to our day.

Gawd Bless the USA.

Kenji is a boy. HE is a BOY. I don’t know what to do to get people to understand this. I dress him in blue and I still get, “Oh, what a cute little girl!”

One day I dressed him in white because it was insanely hot outside. The woman at the UPS store asked me if the baby was a boy or girl. I told her boy and she said, “Well you can’t tell when you dress him in white.” I responded, “It doesn’t matter; even in blue, people still call him a girl.” She echoed my thoughts that they must be retarded because BOYS WEAR BLUE. My next step is to take a Sharpie to his forehead and write I HAVE A PENIS.

If you read this and know me in real life and call Kenji a girl, I will castrate you. You have been warned.

OK, apparently this kid started to mess with Erika’s laptop. She sends me the following Instant message:

[15:09] Erika: i don’t know what your son did but 99% of my mail is going to spam
[15:09] Jay: Bhahaha!

Even clinton finds this funny!